When you hear the word Finances, what’s the first thing that comes in to your mind? Money? Savings? Debt? Spending? All of that is true except that this post is not meant to talk about making more but the proper attitude each one must possess when it comes to handling their finances.
Did you know that in America, the wedding industry is worth $53.4B? In 2013, the average cost of each wedding is $28, 427 (that’s about Php1.3M). In the Philippines there are about 400,000 weddings each year. According to research, a simple wedding can cost Php350,000. If we multiply the cost to the average number of weddings per year, the wedding industry in our country is worth Php140B.
All of these of course is for a day of celebrating, partying, eating, drinking, dancing…and a lifetime of the exact opposite! HA!
So I asked around and did a short survey. I got 62 respondents, male and female somewhere between 25-65 years old, married and single soon to be married.
50% said they are willing to spend an average of Php300,000 for their wedding.
And 50 out of 62 will spend more on FOOD AND VENUE. Which I think is very Filipino since we all love to eat!
96% are willing to SACRIFICE some details so they could save. When asked which details: 38 people said they are willing to sacrifice what the SOCIETY will think about their celebration— how many likes on Facebook, will it trend on Instagram, will it get featured on Bride and Breakfast. 32 people said NUMBER OF GUESTS— more guests meaning more people to feed. 26 people said TRADITIONS— what they are expected to do like the bride must wear a big white wedding gown.
Now, I asked: Who do you think should pay for everything?
91.9% said the COUPLE should shoulder the expenses.
What if the parents offered to help, would you accept? 51 out of 62 said that they WILL ACCEPT financial help if offered. But are you willing to bear with all their requests after accepting their offer? Something to ponder on.
When asked if would you rather SAVE OR SPEND ALL, 58 people said save but 4 said spend all, which bothered me.
Luckily, 100% of the respondents said the LIFE AFTER is more important than one day of celebration.
Before the Wedding
So what is the proper approach to make sure you get the most out of your budget?
- RESEARCH & COMPARE. Don’t settle for what is just in front of you. Ask around and considers candidates. For all you know the Php80k you are willing to pay for photo and video is as good as (or sometimes better) the Php45k your friend was telling you. Ask the supplier’s previous clients and don’t just believe on their portfolios.
I remember hiring the worst wedding caterer on our special day. They were very good on paper and during our first meeting. They made sure to meet all my needs but on the day of the wedding I realized they were my biggest mistake. Not only they were short-staffed but the food did not taste anything like the ones we approved during the tasting. The best part was my brother in-law’s experience. He just got our of surgery few days before the wedding and was still on crutches, he was trying to grab a chair so he can sit and rest when a waiter rushed in and deprived him of the chair because everything was already in place. After the wedding we got hold of the photo booth photos and lo and behold, the first ones we saw were the waiters and crew— which solves the mystery of the missing crew. All the regrets happened because I simply did not research and compare.
- CHOOSE YOUR GUESTS. The most expensive part of a wedding is the reception. Although it is SUCH a Filipino custom to invite the entire clan or Barangay, YOU DON’T ACTUALLY HAVE TO. In my own wedding, I talked to my friends about bringing their boyfriend/girlfriend on the day. I asked them specifically that if you are not going to marry that guy, please don’t bring them with you. Why? If they break up after the wedding, how in the world would I ever delete the guy in our wedding photos? In short, “paano na ang TBT ko?”
I know parents are very much sensitive on this part. One parent would say, “Anak, invite mo yung ninong mo na matagal mo nang hindi nakita.” Exactly! Matagal na. All the people you haven’t been in contact with from the moment you became an adult will all of a sudden come to life for this occasion. DO NOT BE OBLIGATED. Tell your parents politely that if they want you to reconnect with them, set a separate date, Rekindling relationships or introducing new people should never be done in this most intimate time of yours.
- BE SIMPLE. Ditch the elaborate, unnecessary details. It will not just save you money but also the stress you do not deserve. Do you know the objective as to why are you getting married?
If you are reading this today with your partner, ask each other this very moment, Why are we getting married? For love? For companionship? Security? To build a family?
Whether you like it or not, people marry in obedience of God’s law.
“…and the two will become one flesh’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
He commanded that a man and a man must be joined to become one flesh. It’s that simple. This is the objective. This is the reason for your celebration. It doesn’t matter if you have Php1M or Php10k. What matters is that you are marrying THE ONE God chose for you.
Remember this objective: OBEY GOD. Use it every time you feel the pressure in planning. You are not doing this for you, you are doing this for the Lord.
On the contrary, there is nothing wrong with spending hundreds of thousands for your special day if you have it. After all not everyone gets a second chance to this. Spend as you please BUT be careful where your heart leads you. Some women are killing themselves by dieting just so they can fit in their dream dress. Some men are chasing after every single peso they can earn just so he can pay for this one day extravagant affair. Some couples decide not to push through anymore because of the pressure in planning and preparation. All these are meaningless, chasing after the wind. It certainly defeats the objective of marriage. Do not have a million peso worth of wedding and become penny less after. I believe you can be a WISE SPENDER.
Now I want you to imagine your wedding day…call time is at 8AM and the hair and make-up team has finally arrived. The photographers are also inside your room and starting to test some shots. It’s now finally time to walk down the aisle. Fast forward, the minister has already announced that you may now kiss the bride! As you go on to the reception, you can see everyone is happy and enjoying every single detail you prepared for you 150 guests. Again, fast forward to after the reception…you take home all your gifts and you go back to your hotel room and finally spends the first night as Mrs and Mrs. The morning after finally arrives and as you wake up, do you have any idea what to do?
Go here: Finances: After the Wedding